Caged Masculinity Archive post 11/17/2009

I am trapped in a cage of masculinity. Wrapped in chains appearing in invisibility. Tortured by the thought that I have be strong. Not realizing what I thought was strong, was so wrong. To be hugged by my father was not commonplace. Yet, even today there's barely a trace. Knowing that he was not hugged himself. Caused him to transfer this burden of wealth. "Fix your face, boy dont cry" All the time my spirit mourns silently asking "Why?" I have never understood the opposite sex. It caused me to have toxic relationships and expect. Love dont love nobody and who's gonna love me. If love dont mean nothing and especially if I am not free. The best things in life are free. Then why do I suffer cost continually? With God's help I have been able to heal. Take the emotions and wisdom I hold and feel, with the right mindset and perspective. To have balance is my one objective. Be strong, but not be ashamed of my tears. Be faithful, though i have failed over the years. Be sensitive when I want to be cold. Be vibrant in all things and love bold. I just want to be a man, and not be defined by things. Especially my masculinity and all the tradition it brings. Richard J Wright (2009)