When Being Rude is Accepted

I earn a paycheck like many people in this country. I am somebody that has to get up off his butt every morning and punch a time clock. Thank God. As an artist and author, it is a challenge to do it daily. There isnt a day that goes by that I dont think about leaving the Corporate world and doing something different. Well, a brotha have bills, so that just isnt happening right now.

At my job, I deal with the public. Let me just say this, sometimes the public sucks at people skills and professionalism. Now, from the outward appearance I may appear to be a grunt to some. Yes, I use my back and muscles to earn a paycheck. That top notch job Im looking for hasn't come way just yet. So I have to do what I have to do. When Im dealing with the public in my setting, I try my best to be courteous and speak. Too often however, people dont speak back. Have you ever said hello to someone and to only have them not even bother speaking or respond to a greeting. Welcome to my world.

Recently, I was accused of being rude to someone and having an attitude. The sales representative contacted me personally to get my side of the story because it just didn't seem to be right. Well the a-hole apparently cc a whole lot of people at the top about me and it was a concern. The sales person didnt even bother to contact my supervisors because she knew it was an issue with the people in this particular building. Engineers are some of the most gifted people in business but many of them suck at a public relations. They are prima donnas getting paid healthy sums of cash. One thing about money, it can make you go from being a hungry dedicated worker into a full blown snob. Yep, sometimes people think they stuff dont stink. Im a Christian, so I wont utilize the word that is fitting for this ya-hoos. Im used to people walking up to me all over this complex and just start talking about their needs. Do you have such and such? No formal introduction or anything. People dont take the time and say hi, how you doing? They just go off into some request as if I dont even exist or matter to a point. I once shared this same sentiment with a co-worker who then laughed and said "they not supposed to speak to you, you the help. You dont speak to the help" Aint that a _______.

People are funny like that. They get their little feelings hurt and want to ruin you by getting you fired. Now on this particular day, it was rainy the whole entire day. I was getting soaked the whole day. I was trying to do my job when this one guy who was having an exchange with another contractor, abruptly turned my way. I wasnt even facing the guy. He says "how's your day going?" Insert pregnant pause. Im like look at me, Im soaking wet. Tired. You in this little office area dry and all peachy but you asking me how my day going. What does it look like? (I didnt say that, i said all of this to myself in the pregnant pause) lol. Now I was in the office area for about 4 to 5 minutes before he spoke to me at all. Oh I guess I should be grateful for the acknowledgement. Ah alas. It is what it is. People get off being snobs but since Im perceived as a peon I should be grateful anybody is talking to me at all. Get out of here!

Could have I handle the situation differently, Yes of course. However it burns me up that people treat people a certain way because of their vocation. Race and class are two ugliest issues in Corporate America but it is what it is. In retrospect, I probably should have shaken off the liquid sunshine and greet the johnny-come-lately tool with a pleasant smile. Boy sarcasm oozes through my pores. Well, im dont venting. For now.

Pouring Out Your Life

Dr. John Henrik Clarke, one of our greatest Black Historians said at a Black Holocaust Conference I attended back in 1995 that the greatest service one can give is service to God's children. I second that. In this world of social networking and technology, the actually face to face time with people in service is dwindling. Do you remember the days when the gas service attendant actually pumped gas for you? Now it is almost non existant to see a gas service attendant. Do you remember the days when you had to go into a bank to get money or even write a check and give it personally to someone? Those days are more few due to the advances man has made. Service. People who do not work in a service environment may not be able to relate to what I am saying but I do know that many do. I am a deacon in a local church. Every Sunday I render a service to people for and unto God. Truthfully, I render service daily. As a deacon, it is a unwritten rule that your life not only belongs to God but to all people.

Ministry is a tough job. It is many times a voluntary service that is filled with challenges, triumphs and disappointments. However, it is greatest vocation in this world. IMO. Service however, does not need to be done in a church. Many people serve in a number of capacities. The idea however is to give to people. How are giving to people. Some people are too busy to give people their time, talent and even money. We live a world that is filled with hurting people that need encouragement and a life line. You have the capacity to be that life line. In ministry, we pour out our lives. We sacrifice our time to serve people and the needs of the church body. We neglect our families sometimes. Yet, we know that its a greater cause we live for. Sometimes we get beat up by people for what we do. Sometimes you feel unappreciated but you go into it understanding that my service is my sacrificial offering to God. When you do something like volunteering, you have to know that people will be blessed by what you do. You cannot operate as if the world revolves around you. One thing is certain, you get a satisfaction like no other when you see the smiles and laughter of children and adults. People appreciate it when they see Christ in action versus yapping.

I want to encourage you to spend sometime somewhere with some people. Visit an elderly home. Take that extra four bucks you was going to spend at Starbucks and buy a homeless person a meal. Greet someone with a smile. Go to a library. Volunteer at a hospital or homeless shelter. Join an organization dedicated to bettering lives. Women need you. Children need you. I cannot tell you how much children in particular need people. At church, they just want to hug you and talk. Sometimes those hugs and talks are the only hug and talks they get in a week. It is so important. One last thing. Do not ever feel you dont have anything to offer. You do. Your life is a drink. Pour it out and watch God pour more into you than you could ever imagine. Dont let people and their foolishness stop you from being a blessing. You are too important and significant than you may know.

Richard J Wright (2009)

When God Pulls Up a Flower

A certain flower blooms among others,
the sun kisses it just like some of different colors.
Yet, when there comes a time,
set forth from the Divine.
That He will reach down and pluck it up.
He will take it gently in to Himself,
while to human eyes it appears to have been snatched.
The lessons of life sometimes are hard to catch.
Like the one about love.
The greatest of them all.
While this flower was once a seed.
God gave it the breath of life and all that it needs.
We dance among it not knowing someday,
that the God that gave it,
will one day take it away.
So love that flower while love is near.
Cherish its space while it is here.
We behold its beauty for a season.
Then, God takes it away.
For Himself to behold in the everlasting days.
Know my people that no matter where the flower grows,
it is only there for moment for show.
Then God plucks it up from the earth,
to plant it again in heaven.
Oh my people, if you could see
a flower bloom in the heavenly.
Your tears would not sting,
Your heart would not weep.
The flower is finally at home
and finally at peace.

Richard J Wright (2009)

Confidence or Conceited

I have been told by many people that I am conceited. I don't see it. Im not saying it isnt true though. Now, let me explain. I am the type of cat that likes clothes. I like to dress nice. I like to smell good. I own several bottles of cologne and have lots of clothes. My ex-wife hated that I had more clothes than she did. In the relationship. I was the one who had to have a walk in closet. I have a closet full of shoes. It might seem like Im bragging but Im not. I just thought I would share that because truthfully, I remember too well the days when I was struggling. When I started attending church I had one shirt and two pairs of pants. A nice sister at my church brought me some church shoes. I drove a car that was dented up in the front pretty bad. I worked an assortment of part time jobs for over two years. I finally landed a gig in security making 7.50 an hour. I was also paying child support back then. So trust me, there was nothing to brag about. Everything in my house from the couch to the bed was a hand me down. My pastor gave me an assortment of ties to wear. He even gave me money when he thought I might need it. Yes from 2001 to 2003 was very challenging.

Fast forward to now.Im an ordained Deacon and teacher at my church. I work in several ministries at my church. In six years I got two degrees. I wrote and published a book and currently publishing a new book. I have a nice townhome and a nice whip. Nothing expensive or extravagant. Truth is, I work my tail off. Many of my days are 12 plus hours. I wake up at 5:45am, take my daughter to mom's house at 6:15am and make it work at 7:00am. I usually get home after I pick up my daughter about 7:30pm on most days. I cook sometimes but many times we eat out because Im too tired to cook. So basically, its like the song by Mary Mary, its the God in me.

Now lets gets to this issue of being conceited. People sometimes think that I think I am all that. In fact a sister texted me that statement. "you think you all that". Truthfully, I dont. I have a plethora of issues. Most folks dont see that. They dont see the struggle. Truthfully, they are not supposed to. God is good to me. What can I say. I am not special to anyone but I am His child. Much is given, much is required. People dont see that I gave a young brother at my church a pair barely worn platinum gray Jordans. Why? I have a lot of shoes and I cant wear them all. So why not bless a young high school kid? People dont see that I talk and counsel with people going through broken marriages and jacked up relationships. People dont see that I cry as much as I laugh. People dont see that as a man I struggle to raise a 12 year daughter who is sad about missing her brother who died when he was two years old. She hasnt seen her mother in several years and when she does call, she is usually high or drunk. People dont see that my only brother doesnt like me. He missed both my graduations for no apparent reason. When I see him and speak half the time, he acts as if he dont want to be bothered. People dont see that I am still hurting over my own broken marriage. But hey, people think Im conceited or worse arrogant.

Being a deacon at my church. A lot of eyes are on me. What am I supposed to do. Ignore em? Women flirt and sometimes I flirt back. Yet, I never get so high to the point that I dont know where I come from. I grew in Southpark. One of the roughest neighborhoods on the Southside. I make a point to represent my hood because I know many of my brothers are still there. Struggling with alcohol, drug addiction and emotional abuse. I could still be there. Its just God's favor and blessing in my life. When I flip in my car with the top down, I think about the struggle. I think about how fortunate I am. Yeah, I have a swagger but I had that before they called it that. We used to call it confidence. I am confident that I can have success because I know failure all to well.

So what is it? Maybe its my sense of humor. I can be a bit sarcastic with folks. That is my fault. I will own that. Maybe its my charm. I tell you what, there is nothing like turning heads. I aint that cute but I do know how to turn a head or two. I am a big guy. I gotta have charisma and intellegence. Its what works for me. I just make a point to make it work. I am intelligent. I read, I ponder. I write. Sometimes I wish I had other gifts but I only have what the good LORD has given me. One thing is for certain and I dont like it. People tend to get a little jealous. They will get jealous over small stuff. It took sometime to realize that haters really do exist. I told a sister once that I dont cheat myself, I always treat myself. She thought I was (like we used to say, high cappin'). Not at all. I work my tail off and I am going to enjoy the fruits of my labor. Its like my homie Toni Hickman says "so sorry you not on my level, there's nothing I can do to make you feel better". Truthfully, people like to see people fail. Its a crying shame. If I was broke, jacked up and just a hot mess, then people would be like. "aw that's shame, it will be alright" but no. They want to see you fall like a ton of bricks. Lord knows, I fall quite a bit. Yet, I'm not going to give these haters the satisfaction of seeing me fall and fail. I said it once and I'll say it again. I rather fail forward than to succeed going backwards. So, they can call me whatever. I answer only to Richard.

You did what you wanted to do.

Its no secret that I am not a perfect person. Its no secret that I am not the best looking guy on the block. I have many flaws, physically and emotionally. However, I do have a heart and one thing about having a heart is that people will play with your heart if given the chance.


I have a friend who at one time I tried to start a relationship with. I took her out, showed her a good time, the whole nine yards. Now, Im the type of cat that believes in being transparent with people. Especially, if I am trying to deepen our relationship. Therefore, I put my cards on the table, good or bad. Well, truthfully some of the cards was a bit too much for this sister to handle. Its cool. One thing about being a man, you are used to being rejected or dissed by women. Its a numbers game so it is what it is. Yet, this same sister thought she could deal with some of the issues I have. Yet, at the end of the day it was too much.


What is funny is that sometimes its a good thing to check somebody's temperature. Now me and old girl are cool. We are friends. So its all good. So I decided recently to see what her temperature was. I told her I started seeing someone. She then tried to get up in all my business. She asked more questions than a home loan application. Now, the whole time I was laughing because it seemed to me that she was a little bit touched. Now what makes this so funny is the fact that she had a "friend" who just so happen to take her out one night to a spot that she had asked me to take her. (thats another story). Anyway, old girl goes out with the dude the same night and winds up spending the night with the dude. Now she volunteers this info because hey, its all good, we are friends. She then tells me she's spending the weekend with old boy. I sent her a text after the last conversation we had and told her that I wasnt seeing anyone. She then blames me for the lie. (which truthfully wasnt a lie, I just wanted to see what she was going to do) She tells me that she wasnt sure about old boy but the confession I gave about seeing someone was all she needed. She sent me a text telling me that since I told her I was seeing someone. It was enough to let her know she could do what she wanted to do. What?


I hate being blamed for something I had no part of. She wanted to screw old boy and tried to say me telling her I was seeing someone was instrumental in her doing what she did. Hey, If you want to open your legs to somebody, you dont need anyone else to telling something to do it. Now keep in mind, we are just friends. We never slept together and I had not seen her in a while. Just phone conversations and what not. Yet, she never spent any nights at my house, much less the weekend. I'm just saying, come on. You did what you wanted to do. This was the last thing I texted to her. Which led to no response on her part. The truth has a way of making people silent. Me, Im just laughing at the whole thing. How you gonna blame me for what you wanted to do. Did she really need me to tell her Im seeing someone to convince her that she could and want to sleep with someone. Talk about being juvenile.

Epilogue

Well. Its been a few days. I called old girl to see how she was doing. I was met with voicemail. After a couple of calls, I decided to leave her a voicemail. "hey, how you doing, just checking on you, hope the weekend was great. yada yada yada". I guess love is in the air. Which is funny because she used to tell me that she loves me. People are so full of crap. LOL Where is Tina Turner when you need her. Whats love got to do with it? Not a friggin thing. Not a single friggin thing. One thing I do know, when a woman wants to look around, I dont stop her, I dont handcuff her. I let her get it how she live. Me. I just move around. Life is too short and people are too short in their thinking.

When Love Comes Around

There is not a cloud in the sky,
and sun radiates greatly so high.
When love comes around.
I remember the rain,
and I wince at the pain.
Yet it is so far away,
didnt think I would see this day.
When love comes around.

Richard J Wright (2009)

Exile for a while

I am taking sometime away from blogging to get my mind and heart right.
I have deal with some issues regarding relationships.
Sometimes it is good to just unplug and evaluate everything.
There I will impose an exile from blogging for a minute.
I need this to seriously consider somethings.
Until then, facebook will have to do for now. Even that will be limited.
See you all soon.

What Im feeling... Random Thoughts #2

I feel the breeze across my face
with no trace
of an empty space,
that resided in my heart.
I decided to play my part.
Cant go back to the place,
where I once saw her face.
Its all just a ghostly memory.
Wanting it to be just me.
Yet, instead I forge ahead.
My heart wont let me die.
So my thought and reply
is to just charge it to the game.
Knowing there is no shame,
to rearrange the mind frame
and ignite the flame that was quenched,
now I clench my heart and hopes
and get off the bench.
Back into the game I go.
I still got so much love to show.
I still got so much more to grow.
I survive because Im a survivor,
I live because life is now more alive
than its ever been.
You cant tell from the scars
whether i got them 2 days ago or 2 years,
I have set aside my fears,
In hopes that God will help me persevere.
Thats how Im feeling...